Sticky Ink

Click play, sit back and read.

Summer heat pushes all my thoughts into a cool underground cave, I’m left here empty-headed dancing around blank pages. My notebook taunts me with waves splashed all over the front cover, inviting me to dive into the mirage. I turn the empty lined paper, vertically then horizontally, until the grey straight marks merge into a furrowed brow. They wait for me to tattoo between their furrows. Taut tight-ropes, wanting each letter to rest solidly – yet as I write, there is a certain satisfaction in allowing a few letters to simply wobble, then belly-flop onto the tacky kitchen lino.

It’s a Summer of déjà vu, days stuffed full of things I’ve seen before. Bubbling tar-mac – creating toxic elderberries in the street; grass crackling, crunching underfoot; people brazenly complaining about the heat rays rising up from the road. Scattered words are rubbed into my skin, along with sun-cream. Small triggers carry me back in time, a slow motion filling of the paddling pool, and in my head are the voices of my nine year-old friends.

These were the summers of my childhood. Endless strawberry eating, with sprinkles of sugar. The blue of the sky being so blue, nothing else mattered. Searching for pieces of clouds, to collect enough to stitch together a pair of trousers. Cloud trousers. Coke floats. Scummy but yummy, brown froth around the edge of the glass, vanilla ice-cream, liquefied within seconds of joining me on the sun-lounger. Camping in the garden, a rope tied between two trees and an old blanket, my idea of heaven. I’d get in my garden den and travel to Saudi Arabia, or Australia, I’d have make-believe exotic relationships with sun kissed bodies – until it was time to play on the swings, or pick daises. Learning swear words in French, smoking imaginary cigarettes, leaping through rotating sprinklers, I’d scream loud enough to alert the boy next door. Then I’d lie on the grass, watching rainbows captured in the droplets of sprinkler water, disappearing from my skin.

Looking up and seeing this.

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The aqua, aquamarine, azure, cerulean, cobalt, cyan, delft, navy, peacock,royal, sapphire, sky and steel-blue transforming the humans under its gaze. The Teal, turquoise of the sky, erases all thoughts of today. Infinite Summer memories, circle the sky alongside seagulls, shouting at me to get to the sea at the earliest opportunity.

 

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